People spend the first half of their lives trying to fit in and the second half trying to stand out. You may not realize it right now but our lives somehow end up this way, one way or another. We grow up trying to be one thing then one day we just go in the completely opposite direction. There’s no explanation for it, it just happens naturally. By now, you’re probably wondering where I’m getting all this. It’s just one of those things that have been in the corner of my mind that slowly worked its way up to the surface. One day, I just felt a bit of a shift in the way I saw things which spiralled into something unexpectedly life changing.
Let’s start from the beginning—school. We all went through it. Even though we all went to different schools with different pedagogies, one thing remained the same—uniformity. I’m not just talking about the same old uniforms we had to wear every single day. I’m talking about an institution wide uniformity that greatly influenced the way we are, the way we talk, the way we write, the way we react to situations, and even the way we see the world. I’m not saying that school is bad for you (so stay in school), I’m just pointing out an overlooked aspect of it.
From a very young age, we were placed in an environment that upholds certain constructs which naturally push people to stay within the constructs of what is perceived as the “norm”. There’s no escaping it. Everyone just naturally tried to find a place where they fit in and did everything they possibly could to stay under the radar and just be one with the crowd. There are, of course, the few who didn’t give into this and just lived their lives the way they wanted to and acted the way they that made sense to them. The majority, of course, did not understand why there were people so different that they treated them differently. To the point that even the ones who wanted to be different fell into the same construct of fitting in.
Even after leaving school, this pressure of fitting in never went away so people sought out careers based on this. I know a lot of talented people who never pursued their craft because having a career in the arts isn’t taken seriously by most—a sad reality. As a result, people’s talents became mere hobbies that they eventually left behind and the creatives industry didn’t flourish as it could have.
Don’t you every stop and wonder if what you’re doing is something you really want to do? More often than not, people are just satisfied with what they do because they see jobs as a means to an end. Is that really how you want to live your life? Just living a life that you’re just satisfied with?
I don’t know about you but I want to live a life I can be proud of. I want to live the life I have always dreamed of. It may not be how everyone else thinks my life should be lived but it’s my life and that’s what I’ve decided for myself. No matter what happens or how I end up in the end, I have no one else to blame for my success or failure but myself. It’s hard to admit this to yourself and it’s even harder to figure out what to do next, but it’s completely worth it.
Striking out on your own is not something a lot of people do so be prepared for the worst. You will encounter tons of situations that you just have to figure out as you go along. There will be people (especially the older generations) who won’t understand what you’re trying to do but that shouldn’t matter. Just keep going and give yourself time to figure things out. Figure out what you want to do with your life. These things really take time so don’t rush into anything. Listen to your gut. Once you’ve decided on a path, make a plan, and just go with it. Keep at it and you will get there.
There are, of course, people who would whole-heartily choose to live their lives within the “norm” and that’s also okay. But if there’s a little voice in your head that nudges you to rethink your life choices then you better listen. Trust me, that will never go away. You don’t want to wake up one day regretting every single day you put into working for someone else when you could’ve put in the same effort into something that is completely your own and reap the benefits of it later on in life.
The beauty of today’s world is that there are so many different ways to accomplish one thing. We can even create our own platform to convey whatever message we want. If you want to be a model, you can collaborate with a few photographers and put out an online portfolio and start getting gigs. If you want to be a singer, produce songs and submit it directly to radio stations. If you want to be a blogger, just start posting. If you want to invent a whole new career for yourself then, by all means, do it. The only thing you need to do is to keep going. No matter how different it makes you look or feel. Just stand out (in the positive sense of the word) and you will go far. There are way less rules nowadays. You just have to embrace this new age and make it work for you.
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Photography by Alexa Cancio